Let’s Talk about Personal Space

See I’m a closed up person. I’m not the book type where the more you get to read, the more I open up. In fact, I feel as though you are the wrong type of reader or you just don’t spend enough time in a library, you will be getting to read a different book. Actually, for every reader that gets the right book, every wrong reader gets a different book because, different approaches and let’s face it: I don’t want you comparing notes with each other.

However, (keeping in line to the excellent book analogy because I’m fabulous for thinking of it in the first place) all readers alike get a common introduction. #NoHate #AllLivesMatter I like to (try to) be funny, a bit chatty, open to listening and being a cheerleader about saving the world and spreading sunshine on rainy days #haw

Still for all, there are few things I don’t speak much on for various reasons among which include:

(Local and International) Politics

No, I’m not trying to be diplomatic about it. Truth be told, unless it’s the UNFCCC or your names happen to be Trudeau or Macron, I’m not interested in knowing about you either. Mostly because I am a little blissfully unaware about what really goes on. Shameful I know, but I’m not lying when I say that it bores me. Sometimes to near death. I’m not proud of it needless to say but at least I’m being honest about it and avoid partaking in conversations I don’t quite understand much of.

On How Parents Should Parent their Children

Of course I will give ample advise on how I would raise my unborn children and in my mind write countless blog posts about how wrong I think you are raising your own. But, I for one will most likely not be able to afford any of my own and since you are bravely raising children, I genuinely do believe that you have a better idea of what you are doing with your kid(s), I think.


While education is essential and a right for all, let’s face it. In reality, not everyone has access to it and due to various reasons, those who do have access to it sometimes leave it behind due to commitments, financial concerns, more lucrative job offers and the genuine lack of interest in wanting to study. While education is one way towards the road of smart(dom), it isn’t the only way and learning happens in everyday life and not just in an institution.

Sexuality and Gender

I added both, despite knowing very well that one is different from the other because I am unable to clearly explain as to how one differs from the other. My Gender Studies lecturer from 2012/2013 will be disappointed, I know. But like what you may, who you may and do whomever you please, so as long as you stay away from my man, you and I can always, ALWAYS drink together. I’ll even buy you a round.

Body Size

Let’s just say, #AllBodiesAreBeautiful

and they are! If you are unable to see beyond that, you and I clearly cannot be friends.

Facebook Relationship Statuses

If you are not on Facebook, well I don’t think this would apply to you, but irrespective of you being single, married, widowed, divorced and any other new type of relationship you choose to be in, I’m chill, with the exceptions of you either complaining about your chosen status or making out with you bae next to meet when we meet every four months for dinner. (ew)


These include the beliefs and practices of my own, of yours and those around us. Unless otherwise provoked with hateful comments on any religion, I will continue to believe that all religions speak of love, unity and togetherness because that’s what all religions preach. I think.

Coz we all love the pope.

This also means that I bear judgement (maybe a bit on parenting one tho) and have no biases (unless you are a child of war or divorce) on the different perspectives you and the rest of the world choose to believe in.

Because, personal space right?

We will soon speak on religion and agnosticism. However, if the sun chooses to shine and rays of inspiration hit me, I will speak of travels.

Let’s Talk Floods – Part V

I found myself panicking during last year’s floods. It was probably the first time in my “adult” life that I had seen a calamity of that extent and moreover, affected to those closest to me. Devastated would be a more accurate word to describe what was going on. You know how ‘news becomes news’ to you noh, “if it is in vicinity” or something to that extent they teach you in journo class. It changed how I saw things. It gave more perspective to how I see consumption in the light of climate change and God forbid, it probably even made me more sensitive.

But then see, it is happening again.

Let’s be honest, sensitivity to those of us, don’t come easy and it actually comes by only once.

This time around, I am angry. I am furious.

Yes, I agree that people can’t sell their houses just like that and move away to higher ground. I understand not everyone has means to do so. But at least take precaution?

Let’s be honest, you had an year to prepare.

And no, this is not me blaming the government.

This is me blaming those who live by these riverbed areas who assume that their aeons of non-technical layman experience can overstep the word of science, measurements and accuracy. Almost, accuracy. 

True, our DMCs and other organisations responsible need to up their game. They need to have better management, better organisation and the works. But for the latter, our private-funded ish volunteer-led associations have stepped up to liaise with them and there are better deeds happening. Or at least it seems so from behind this laptop screen.

But you, yes you who lives in these disaster-esq areas. WHAT ARE YOU DOING? Are you taking precaution? Have you even looked into purchasing an insurance for your house? Do you have that emergency bag stacked up in a corner to take and go? The latter was a little practice we used to have (or imagining because I was little) during the time of the war, 94-96. We don’t have an emergency pack truth be told (I have one in my car), but should the necessity arise, my parents and I, will leave.

No material thing in your household is more worthwhile than your lives.

Yes, you might not be able to replace them for a long time, but someday you might or you could just steal them, I don’t know.

But this lack of preparation and organisation among the people affected really makes me angry. Why are they STILL not co-operating? Didn’t they lose enough last year? Christ, this scares me from behind a screen. Is this not real enough for you?

Also, has anyone posted a disaster-selfie just yet?

Let’s (try to) Talk about Sex Education?

It’s a topic I’ve been wanting to speak on for a long time, but haven’t for the usual reasons, i.e.- procrastination and then for the more diplomatic reasons on whether we should speak about it at all. Because I mean after all, these sort of topics are saved for after marriage and I’m not married noh.

See but then this post is not about having sex. Don’t get me wrong. It’s more on the need for educating people about sex. Also most of these images are shamelessly stolen off the Internet.

If you do want to know more about sex and the works, I would suggest some sort of magazine or website and in other unrelated news, Playboy is bringing back nudes!


This post on the other hand was inspired partly by one of my drivers. We were driving back from Kurunegala a few days ago and he tells me,

මිස් දන්නවාද, Valentine’s Day  වල තමයි වැඩියෙන්ම ගෑණු ළමයි දූෂණය වෙන්නේ.”

Translation: Do you know that the most number of girls get raped on Valentine’s Day?

And no, I didn’t know that (and I don’t know if it is true). And yes, this post was to come out on Valentine’s Day but then I got busy with work (no there were no Valentine’s celebrations from this end as we are too old for that you know, lol) and never got around to it.

However, this conservation with my driver led to us talking about sex education, rape, contraception, family planning, STDs and unwanted pregnancies that these girls clearly knew nothing of.

See, before we go any further let’s throw out a few disclaimers for ol’ times sake but mostly because we live in a supposedly sensitive as fuck world where everyone seems to take offence for everything. Also since we are talking about “adult” topics, we will be swearing because, duh.

  • This post is not meant to draw sympathy on women.
  • Neither is this post aimed at penalising men.
  • Nor does it conform to the norm that women are victims and men are those at fault.
  • I will only focus on the male and female genders and  heterosexual relationships because these are the populations that have easily accessible data and stuff.
  • Also:
just letting ya'll know. (also shamelessly taken off Google)
just letting ya’ll know. (also shamelessly taken off Google)


Since this post has been coming a few days and I’ve lost my train of thought one too many times for my liking, let me try to go through a few reasons as to why I think we need to speak more on sex, having sex and well most importantly, having safe sex.

just sayin'
just sayin’


I usually refer the dictionary on themy Mac for definitions and this is what it had to say on consent:


A lot of the time, rape takes place when the “victim” (we are trying to be gender neutral here) has no idea that what is happening to them is wrong. This is true especially in the case of children and rape within their own families. I also have no numbers and statistics to back this information. If you are looking for a good read with numbers I strongly recommend the Bill and Melinda Gates Open Letter.

So it’s pretty simple right? If someone does something without the other’s permission, or consent, it is a violation of their rights or privacy or something on those lines.

Eg: – A few weeks ago someone took away the (my) laptop I was working on to show another some screen on Facebook, without asking me. No consent!

If you are still confused, the following video explains it thoroughly as well. I recommend you watch it as a family or a classroom – though I’m very well aware that my audience does not attract such people, haha.

The Birds and the Bees

Okay, I get it. I’m Sri Lankan too and my Mum never spoke to me about the birds and the bees. And still to date as a twenty-something year old I’m confused as to what the birds and the bees have to do with this. Why can’t we go more Freud about it and call it a lock and key or snake and window or you get the point. Or if you don’t, your mind is not dirty enough to be reading this post. 

Again, if you do have five minutes at hand, this is a very good video to watch or show the children around you.

See, a lot of the time, when there is no education or well discussion on what really happens when people have sex, it leads to things like, you guessed it, rape!

There is no shame in talking about it to children and truth be told, if I were to have kids, I would start speaking to them or introducing the concept of sex from primary school. It would not only teach them what they ought to do to protect themselves but also teach them the right way of treating others and respecting them.

True we have Google and most in my generation, a few before and all those younger to me rely on the Internet for information. However, the Internet too has come a long way since early Millennium dial-up and information sharing. It has become more vital than ever for everyone to not only cross check news sites (because fake news brings money too, it seems) but also inquire on the authenticity of information provided. Hence, if parents or adults are not going to speak to their kids about this, they will only rely on the Internet for (mis)information.

I asked my Mother recently as to why she never told me about how children are made / babies are born. She laughed it off and said that I knew more than she did. While I did laugh along with her because it was funny, it did also dawn on me that there are many kids out there who are incapable of having such conversations with their parents. What are they to do then? 


I saved the best for last because I believe that contraception becomes the solution to a lot of unwanted and unplanned situations including STDs and (not so) happy accidents.

Okay, let’s assume that consent has been attained and now two individuals (no I’m not looking at sexual relations with more than two people so don’t be offended) are maybe going to have sex for the first time. So no, they won’t get STDs and that box is checked. However, in the case of a heterosexual relationship, what about the risk of pregnancy?

If it amounts to anything on the lines of progress, which I think it is, some of the Healthguard Pharmacies here in Sri Lanka now not only sell condoms on shelves but also have emergency contraceptives as well. I think this is great as it not only reduces the risk of anything you are not really ready to have for but most importantly reduces the stigma and mental strain someone would have to go through when asking for it over the counter.

On another positive note, Sri Lanka is a country that does not require prescriptions for Oral Contraceptive Pills or OCPs. I don’t really know what this means in a medical sense, but as a layman or woman, I think this is a great progressive step as it again shortens the number of steps one would have to climb when wanting to have safer sex and access to contraceptives. While there isn’t a plethora of choices to choose from, I guess this is a start of sorts.

sorry, Google.
sorry, Google.

If you are interested, here is an excellent compilation done by Pew Research on abortion policies across the world.

Other suggested reading:

The least we can do from our end is to probably talk about it more to well, normalise it in to general conversation so that there will be no stigma when anyone would want to ask questions about it (as opposed to Googling for an answer).

There is no shame in parents or teachers speaking to their children or educating students on sex and all the other safety precautions they need to know because it would seriously do this country a world of good. See, once the discussion is out there in the open there would be criticism and probably a ban on speaking about the topic in open (like in the case of the big matches) but until that time, there is a sense of responsibility from every generation to the next.


Let’s Talk about Prostitutes

A lot of people have already begun talking about it and clearly this post will not necessarily make a difference, but there are rants in my head that need to be written somewhere and if you don’t feel like reading it, no worries!

This is totes obvs with reference to the piece of shit writing on The Sunday Leader yesterday, which was shared by the lovely Aisha. I strongly suggest you read the ridiculous article by The Sunday Leader either way, in order to add some context to the story. 

Let’s start by saying that I, for a long time have been bias towards the cause of prostitutes. I’ve always thought that there was nothing wrong with selling your body and making a living out of it, because a) at corporates people tend to sell their souls anyway, haha and b) the way men leer is actually no different to the “male” customer that goes in search of female prostitutes.

Few disclaimers too (because the world gets ridiculously offensive at everything we have to say now):

  • I’m not going to call them commercial sex workers because it makes no difference anyway. Or maybe it does and it doesn’t really matter to me. It’s different to the differently-abled / disabled debate. Let’s just call a spade, a spade okay.
  • All supposed relationships in this are for heterosexual people. I don’t know too much on homosexual / bisexual prostitutes to speak as much on it.



Dear Ashanthi,

As my friend Aisha points out, “young girls are suffering from the loss of virginity” is not a disease. Sometimes girls, if not women, lose their virginity at a young age due to rape. Or maybe due to consensual sex with their teenage boyfriend. You don’t “suffer” because of this “loss”. Such sufferings occur in the “loss” of a family member.

More on the “loss”, you don’t really “lose” anything. True there is the story of the hymen breaking and what not, but really it’s not a loss man, grow up for fuck’s sake. It doesn’t even work the same way for all women.

“In most cases innocent but naive young girls, seduced by their boyfriends, lose their virginity due to their affairs. But then, instead of coming back to the right track, they wander away in life astray dipping deeper into the abyss.” 

Like what the actual fuck. What if these girls who have gone “astray” have done so because it is a choice that they have made? Just as the misogynists would say that rape is something women bring upon themselves because of the clothes they wear (another rant for another day), sometimes women go astray, sleep around with multiple men, BECAUSE THEY WANT TO. Grow up lady, the world is not as rosy as you think it and there are women who enjoy having sex with one man or multiple men, and if they are sexually consenting adults who would do it for a fee, what on earth is your problem?

“However, in Sri Lanka, this has become a serious issue due to the ignorance of the authorities for many years.”

Dearest Ashanthi, have you stopped to realise why there is an increase in “commercial sex workers” and an increase in rape? Because men are fucking frustrated. I’ve always thought (and I know that I’m not alone in thinking so) that if prostitution was legalised that there might be a slight decrease in rape because of the increased number of sexually consenting women? I might be wrong, I don’t know, because I don’t have the numbers. But logically, this works out well in my mind and in my utopia, male and female prostitution will always be legal and girls can walk home in mini skirts at eleven in the night. (and so can men, without being harassed or mugged, because we are all equal here, Jesus.)

“But the second group which consists of the majority, are women who have become helpless without anyone to look after them…. The opinion in the society about these women varies as some have criticised their work while some have felt sorry about their misfortune. When we look into the real reasons that have compelled them to become sex workers, we too tend to justify their fate.”

I actually agree with you on this statement. When men who are husbands, fathers, care takers, breadwinners or whatever else you feel fit to call them, fail to do what “society deemed them to do”, women have to take on their role of providing for the family. Some women, who are fortunate enough to have basic education, finds work at a minimum-wage job and the more fortunate middle or higher-class ones are able to find work in the private sector. The rest of the women who are not at such an advantage have to fall back on either daily labour or prostitution. Those who are able to would naturally choose the latter because it’s human to want to make more money faster. I work three jobs, you see.

“In a corrupt society, the lack of solutions for their social problems have compelled many women to become sex workers.”

Our society is corrupt for a number of reasons that I think include: those who come in to power, mismanagement of people’s money, greed, lack of solid foundation for education (and the necessary tools that come with it) that can lead to things like prostitution yes. (I can rant on infrastructure and inefficient government services but I don’t think that’s what we are ranting about now).

Besides your blatant ignorance, supposed reasons for gallivanting at three in the morning in the name of trashy investigative journalism and most importantly the lack of really good sub-editor, I am yet to find enough reason as to why The Sunday Leader would run something on these lines. Or perhaps, they were needing a publicity stunt and thought that this trashy piece of writing would make us buy the paper despite the terribly cheap print quality they have.

Go get laid woman.

From, a lot of angry women.

Let’s Talk Floods – Part IV

It’s been nearly three weeks two weeks and four days after those terrible floods and landslides. By the time you read this, most likely on Monday or something, it might even be three. The “big rains” have now ceased and the monsoons have taken over. People have moved on in life, Muhammad Ali died at the age of 74, an armoury blew up some place close to home and caused massive fireworks in the skies, newer “news” has happened.

The flood victims too have moved “on” to their old homes. Most washed away by mud and other loathsome things with dead fish and rats floating about the place. There is only little left besides themselves, the possessions they took along with them and the ones unharmed as a result of having been left on a slab or second floor that can be saved.

Last week I drove to my Grandmother’s place to drop off some stuff. There is an unsustainable situation in the house as a result of having a few vehicles in the house, but at times like this, small vehicles are great for transport and deliveries I feel.

On my way to Mummy’s (I call my Grandmother “Mummy”) all I saw was rubble. Piles and piles of rubble. Clean roads, most likely washed away by the flood, but clean, yet rubble. Not just any rubble either, but possessions of rubble. Mattresses. Furniture. Beds. Cushions. Rubble that cannot be replaced as easily as buying a few groceries off the supermarket. Just piles of it, neatly stacked in the corners of the road every five to fifteen feet. What do they live with now, if most or all of what they own have been stashed against the sides of the road? 

Then the lorries collecting these rubble. A line of lorries parked on the side of the road one behind the other, filling up the back of their vehicles with these piles of rubble. That’s all I kept thinking of as I drove to Mummy’s: rubble, rubble, rubble. 

For those who saw (or went to see)

the flood.

While multiple reports and rescue missions warned everyone on how people should stay away from the flood, something inside me asked how it would’ve been had I not “seen” the flood when waiting to get my grandparents out.

It’s something that I am still unable to explain nearly three weeks after but those who saw knew. Those who saw felt. Those who saw realised what was at stake and what we lost. Those who saw also took selfies, but that’s a conversation for another time.

Not a big fan of adding flood pics but this.
Not a big fan of adding flood pics but this.

I’m glad I saw what I did. While a lot of what was planned and expected did not turn out as it was supposed to, it did provoke within me a need to do something about what’s happening. And trust me when I tell you that such needs have not arisen before.

But then, part of me wishes that I did not see what I did. Because once you did, there is no going back really. There is no break from unseeing what you saw and that leaves you a little broken inside every time you buy something new or spend on something you shouldn’t because then you wonder on how that money could’ve benefited someone else instead.

The rains are yet to leave us. I will soon write on what’s in my handbag and carry-on bag, but until such times, #ThinkSunny

Let’s Talk Floods – Part III

I’ll be honest with you. I thought this would be a one-off post. But we’ve made it to three so yay for me! I’ve turned into a poet in the process as well, eek. In today’s post, we speak of two things: racial or ethnic preferences and vulnerability. The latter is a bit of a hot topic in the development world so apologise in advance for the ranty-panties. 

Preferential Treatment 

Not too long ago, the former government was responsible for teaching us the definition of the word,  nepotism. Trust me, some English majors are not walking dictionaries or language gurus. However, once the new government came in we did see a bit of preferential treatment extended towards immediate family members and what not too – I don’t know what that is called to be honest or if that too is another form of nepotism. But don’t worry, I’m not here to rant about the government. I’m an apathetic “youth” that cares less about what it does with this country and frankly, I don’t know enough to speak on it either and hence I will not.

But somehow, this newly defined (by new I mean, new to our vocabulary as a result of not having used it as much in the past) term seems to have extended itself to the general public as well.

While I do agree on helping those close to home or reacting to the manner in which a news bulletin would and report what is most familiar, urgent and / or near to us; at times of crises when those not so near to us are among those near to us, I don’t see the need for the implementation of this newly defined word. Do you get what I am saying?

See, I’m a mix-bred child. In school I studied one religion, which I did practice up until a certain time of my life. Then in the name of education and supposedly worldly experience, questioning became a part of nature and the importance of balance and all that jazz became pivotal.

Shamelessly stolen off the internet
Shamelessly stolen off the internet

Hence at times like this when you hear a particular religious or ethnic group attempting to reach out to their own kind, the only thing I will do is discourage such practices and attempt to write long posts speaking on my displeasure towards this, because let’s face it: we all want to be an internet hero. 


So excited to speak on this because, this word is something most NGO folks cannot get enough of.

V-u-l-n-e-r-a-b-l-e: doesn’t that sound magical to you?

Now there is this little notion floating around despite the drop in water levels, on how we should help the most vulnerable. 

Another shamelessly stolen image from the internet
Another shamelessly stolen image from the internet

Pray tell me, who is the most vulnerable over here? Women and children? Senior citizens? The disabled community? Are we also throwing in a LGBTQ (++ other letters) over there too – no offence to you guys, just that the particular community keeps expanding a lot.

Today is about stealing copyright images
Today is about stealing copyright images

Let me tell you what happens on our side of the world. When it comes to provision of donor funds or drafting of proposals or tackling potential funding opportunities, we try to throw in a bit of the vulnerable because why not, the donors love it! I won’t say that it’s a bad thing as some countries here in South Asia and most countries in Africa are surviving to date because of the great work carried out by NGOs and other non-governmental entities especially when compared to the bare minimum done by the government.

However, in this context how does it work out?

  1. Houses 1-5 are situated in an affected area.
  2. Houses 1 and 5 are built on a relatively elevated-foundation (pray there be such things) with a second floor.
  3. Houses 2-4 are not as fancy with a single story with the exception of house 3 that has gone up to slab-level and a staircase but stopped because building houses is expensive.
  4. During the time of the flood, house 1 and 5 are lucky enough to remain in the house as they have another storey and remain there. The water level marks up to around 3 feet.
  5. However houses 2-4 are not as lucky and reported a rough marking of 5 feet of water.

Now, when you go about your post-disaster work, will you provide rehabilitation equipment or facilities for only houses 2-4 while houses 1 and 5 looks on? 

I just stole this as it was irrelevant and hilarious
I just stole this as it was irrelevant and hilarious

That’s all I have to rant about today. Until more flood times, haha. I joke.

P.S. – The sun is more or less out there and I suggest you go dry your clothes. Haha.

Let’s Talk Floods – Part II

So yesterday was a bit of an unproductive day for me and Mum. We went to Angoda, IDH and Wellampitiya areas and while the water levels seem to be chilling while they are at it, so at the moment, there isn’t a lot that anyone can do. In a modified statement inspired by Dickens,

It wasn’t the best of day, it wasn’t the worst of days, ‘twas a meh day.

For most of the part, the day was unproductive. Given that we are not directly involved in the gathering of rations etc, there wasn’t a lot that we could do.

It was frustrating. Walking up and down, trying to be of help, but often being mistaken for the “tourists” from yesterday, because yes we may have broken a laugh there or giggled a bit over here while navigating our way through the crowds. Let’s also casually throw in there about how these tourists casually pick up rations and food meant for victims – but I guess that’s okay because of the excess supply we have to deal with (read below).

Continuing on the frustration, I for one felt really hopeless because I couldn’t physically do anything. However, after coming home, tired and disappointed I realised that I was good with co-ordinating things, keeping track of stuff and making endless lists, so that’s exactly where I put my skills to use.

Rescues are still going on. People are still being trapped wanting to come out but let’s spend a while talking about those still in their houses.

No, I cannot empathise with your cause, I agree and hence it might not be my place to comment. But I will anyway. Do you realise that so many people are still sending out cooked food water and rations for you and boats and 4×4 are extremely expensive to maintain and operate? Yes, we should not look at things like money at times like this but if I were honest, we are a poor country and most people don’t have a lot to give, which is why some of us are offering labour, skills for post-flood. 

While your possessions are important, you should also realise that if everyone was in a common area or base camp, if not with their own friends and relatives, the security personnel and relief teams can successfully conduct their operations and set some order to this chaos. 

But no, you decided to stay in your house. Sorry not sorry but this makes me really angry. There is also a deep concern for the rise in water-borne and other diseases but clearly we are not worrying about that are we.

*This is not applicable to those in camp sites surrounded by water.

For those Still Eager to Volunteer

If you are still desperately trying to get involved though, do go through Facebook for about an hour and there will be people who need help with packing goods and all.

Also if you have the means, take goods and set out to Colombo to Puttlam or Kilinochchi.

Other ideas include trying to find contacts, make deals and proposals with those supplying mineral water and other products for post-flood. Currently I am told that supermarkets being sold out and it would be good to have these numbers to give it those with means.


In the areas we were there yesterday, a lot of food is going to waste because people are just pouring in with it. Here are a few things that we observed:

  • There is an excess of food. Yes, everyone wants to help but this is just crazy.
  • Food is usually cooked in the morning hours and sent for distribution towards afternoon and chances of food getting piled up, is high. Mum saw a little mountain of it.
  • If you are still eager and adamant to give food, kindly ask volunteers if you could prepare meals for them.
  • Another point to note if you are providing cooked food, do not wrap it when it is too warm and keep in mind what you are adding in there too. Not to sound fussy but those who cook would know that food like salmon, raw coconut (for pol sambol) and  coconut milk causing food to go pretty bad quick.
  • Continuing on the excess of food, we are told (specifically in the areas we were at) that people are now refusing to eat and keep throwing away half-eaten packets due to the monotony of it. An excess of supply results in these things like fussy eaters, it seems, even in times of crisis.
  • Which brings to my final point, waste. There are no proper waste collection methods in place, animal rights advocates are asking for people to bring them to the animal shelters and realistic-tree-huggers like myself think that we should throw it in a biogas unit or compost bin. Whatever floats your boat, but please do not litter.
  • Please read this if you have the time, it’s something that we can all learn from the Nepal Earthquake and how to go about rescue, relief and aid.
  • Two points after my final point, let’s not forget that it’s Vesak.


I spoke on this yesterday as well, but Mum and I putting together and I’m going to casually keep plugging this in over here. We are putting together a very small but realistic plan that will hopefully help those living in a small area. We know our means and are well aware of our capacities and hence are narrowing it down smaller places just so we could do an effective job there as opposed to a simple general sweep.

For those curious on floods in general and are still not convinced, I urge you all to read this.

Please stay safe and well. The sun is almost upon us.

Let’s Talk Floods – Part I

I know this sounds all ridiculous and shiz, blogging during times like these but seriously though, there is a lot that needs to be written during this time, which I would not want to Tweet out or share through Facebook posts because between you and I, I’ve been a bit of an overshare these days and I just am not liking it. Tough times.

Also as a disclaimer if I may add, the most of the following is based on the 1/gazillionth of what I witnessed and a few pointers here and there were from if-I-was-in-their-shoes thinking times while driving all the way back to dotèy. But as a Millennial in Colombo, I had not seen a “live flood” before and I think what I saw shook me beyond words can say.

  1. For Victims

Leave your homes if you must or are asked to. Yes, there are looters and thieves who will boat themselves into your house and steal your things but if there is a God and there is Karma, they won’t get very far.

Yes, you would not want to leave either your newly built and furnished house, trust me, we just shifted and I wouldn’t want to either. But if you are supposed to evacuate, please co-operate and do so.

Do not keep asking for food parcels to be sent to you, because these boats can instead carry people back to safer higher land.

If you do not leave your house with those who have come to rescue you, do not think that boats and 4x4s will come to your at your beck and call.

You should realise that there is no electricity and access to clean water and what will you drink or cook with?

Are you also aware that water-borne diseases, mosquitos, rat fever, waste water and Heaven knows what else are floating in the water you might be calf-deep walking in?

So please evacuate and most importantly co-operate with those co-ordinating these rescue missions. On the same lines, if there is a God and there is Karma, genuine people will always be rewarded and given back.

Avoid posting on social media while important yes, is not vital. Remember that there still might be people who will be in a danger zone in a few days time should the rains not stop. The last we should do is cause them unwanted panic and stress.

Unless you think that it helps deal with the grief, try to avoid generating conversation around the topic. Honestly, talking about it is not going to bring your things back and it makes us sad too as we are genuinely helpless and cannot do anything to better the situation either.

Finally, on the lines of co-operation, I know it’s hard and maybe I don’t empathise, but please do not complain. I don’t mean to sound like a bit of a coloniser and sound like a bit of a slaver type, but seriously, people are worried for you and we are doing our best to help you. We make the food with care for you so yes, it might not be a luxurious meal as we are looking at cooking for masses.

2. For Volunteers

For those on the ground, thank you for all that you are doing. It is making a difference and people are being saved, so thank you.

For those at home not able to go out and are behind a screen online, thank you as you help with the dissemination of information.

For those who are interested in volunteering, seek out volunteering opportunities first. Facebook is a good place to start and most of these posts seem genuine. At the moment, the main focus is rescue missions and cooked food, so if that is something you do not have the capacity to accommodate, think of putting together lists or helping out with co-ordination and getting information across to the correct channels.

Another way you could volunteer would be offer to drive around people. There is a lot of food and donations going up and down. Offer to pick up and drop off things, so that’s a great thing you could do. If you own boats, tippers or 4x4s, offer to go to the flood affected areas, it would be so great of you.

If you live in the area or in a neighbouring town, open your doors to others. Make tea and give water to those on the ground. Give them your phone chargers or wifi so they can get through to their other family and friends.

For the Forces, Disaster Management Centre and other local authorities, thank you for all that you are doing. While there are many things we feel that could’ve the extent of this calamity, we will save that conversation for another day.

On the other side of things, try to keep your phones charged and families and friends informed. You are doing great things, but remember that you too have people who care about you and await to hear from you. Wear protective gear or shoes or be aware of what you are getting your body into, just like for the victims, you too have the risk of stepping into something you would rather wish you didn’t.

Also on the social media side of things, it’s great to post the work you do and all, let’s try to refrain from being a bit of an overshare with the pictures and be mindful of what you post. People are sensitive in times like these.

3. For Donors

Thank you again for what you are doing. A lot of these people would not be where they are if not for you.

There is however something that concerns me. This collection of dry rations. While you might have your own reasons for collecting what you do, I think it’s important to give people food they can consume. So if you cannot cook for a large group of people, a loaf bread and a bottle of jam per family is better food than ten kilos of rice.

Other donate-worthy items during my if-I-was-in-their-shoes times, I thought would be good include:

  • Torches
  • Candles / matches
  • Shoes / slippers
  • Towels
  • Dettol
  • Soap
  • Pillow / sleeping items
  • Medicine items for injuries
  • Mortein / mosquito coils

4. For General Public

Yes, you are concerned and so are we. But if you do not have the means to help or volunteer, STAY AWAY FROM THE FLOODS (or landslides). The guy helping us get my family back to safe land called the “tourists” who would park their “little vehicles” (not to sound demeaning, I too drive a little car but at times like these, we need big vehicles at times like this) and go for “walks” in my over-mentioned water-borne disease-d, mosquito-ridden, rat fever-infected, waste water-ridden water, WITH FAMILIES and little children, if I may add.

Please stay away damnit. For fuck’s sake, stay away. If there is an emergency, volunteers and forces have a lot of other responsibilities and saving these “tourists” are not on their priority list.

Yes, it is important to see this disaster and take to heart the extent of what has happened, if I hadn’t either, I don’t think I would be as driven to do what I do with my Mum, but it’s not a spectacle or something we ought to take a selfie in.

Also, please try to be civilised and please refrain from taking food packets and water brought for those in need and for volunteers.


This is the section where I feel require the most amount of importance. At the moment, from what I see, there is a lot of help coming in from all over, which is great. But what happens after the quake (or flood and landslides)?

My Mum and I thought long and hard about this because we know our capacity and what we are capable of: we are neither lifeguards nor rescue mission workers nor own big vehicles. What we are good at is co-ordination, putting together medical camps and gathering people. Hence, the two of us and a couple of other close friends are planning on putting together a post-flood relief stall or hut that would have cook-in stalls (for meals), cleaning up (for houses) and trauma counselling in the Kotikawatte and Wellampitiya areas as we have a few basic connections to get things moving. What we need then will be written in a later post, so till then, stay safe out there.

P.S. I know that there are other affected areas in the country and Kegalle is suffering from landslides, and all I can think of is sending them my hope and sunshine all the way from here.